Dear Friends,
I’m writing this on November 3, 2024 – the day after Kamala Harris lost the 2024 presidential election to Donald Trump. It’s taken me a minute to gather my thoughts. Like many of you, I’m still in shock.
It’s clear that “what’s happened” is different than what happened 2016 when most of us thought it was a glitch, one of those “history moves forwards and backwards” that offered a begrudging measure of hope and insight.
So what do we do now? Do we plan to storm the Capitol and have our own January 6th? Of course we’re not going to do that, because we’re not the ones who claim that elections are stolen when we don’t like the outcome.
So for those who—like me—are experiencing shock, it will take some time to grieve and process. Then, ultimately the question will be: what do we do now? That’s the through line. What do we do now?
If it’s helpful, here’s what I’m telling myself today:
- Right now, all you can do is take care of yourself and your people. It’s ok to feel all your feelings. Feelings won’t kill you. Sadness and rage is a correct and normal reaction to this kind of injustice.
- Stop beating yourself up for being hopeful and believing that America was ready for a change. Compassion (for others and for myself) is something I’ve been working on. My first reaction to the news was to berate myself for being such a naive idiot. But (for a change) I’m trying to treat myself with kindness and just sit with the tough emotions.
- White women have disappointed us again. To my white sisters who believe that your proximity to power is going to keep you safe, you’re about to find out just how wrong you are.
- Stay in the now. While it’s tempting to jump ahead to the shit show that is (surely) coming, I’m trying to remind myself that RIGHT NOW I’m safe and ok.
- Do whatever it takes to regulate your emotions and soothe yourself. For the next few days giving myself a pass to eat my feelings, watch Disney movies, spend the day on the couch with the dog, and drink enough wine to get myself to sleep.
- Get some help and support. I found a therapist a few months ago (after remembering how my mental health tanked in 2016.) I’m grateful that I have support to help me navigate these unprecedented times.
- Put your money where your mouth is. (I just put in an order to sell my Tesla stock and I’ll be changing vehicles as soon as it’s viable.
Sometimes, to give myself perspective, I imagine I’m on my deathbed thinking back on what I’m most proud of. I will never regret loving my people, fighting for justice, embracing kindness, and trying to help folks who weren’t born with the same advantages I enjoy. I’m proud of who I love, what I’ve defended, what I’ve stood for, and the ways I’ve tried to help.
But there’s so much more to be done.
I realize that some people who read this post will feel differently, because that’s the nature of a polarized world. But I’m choosing not to worry about that. My commitment is to share openly and honestly. There are many important battles to be fought in the days ahead. That’s why it’s has never been more important to remember that our greatest weapon is our ability to turn our hope into action.
I’m holding space for everyone who is hurting as we tend our broken hearts.
